I’ve figured out why I’m a terrible person: I lack conviction and chapstick.  The chapstick I could just buy, but I’ve resigned myself to the fact that I am never going to remember to do so at the appropriate time, which annoys me almost as much as going without chapstick does, thereby making me a bitch.  Then there is conviction, which I have no idea how to acquire.  Insights appreciated.


I don’t understand how I’m “Too Broke” to buy a new computer mouse, yet I can spend over ten dollars on coffee in three days.  Especially since I have a coffee house right on campus where I don’t even have to spend real money.  What the hell is wrong with me, besides the lack of conviction and chapstick.  I think I’ve replaced these things with coffee.  I think I’ve replaced everything with coffee.  Why must I be so prone to addiction, and why must I be addicted to something so expensive?  How do I get myself addicted to doing laundry, or doing my homework, or waking up in the morning?  Those would be handy.  But who am I kidding, I’m addicted to self-destruction.  Insight and coffee appreciated.  Just keep the cocaine away from me, please.

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2 responses

  1. I’ll tell you what- you become addicted to taking the greyhound bus to Chicago, I will become addicted to you.  there.   No more coffee no more problems just bus rides and Sarah. That’ll keep me from becoming addicted to shopping ( which has already happened and is reeking havoc on my bank account) and it’ll keep you…well….happy?

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